Stressing the future
By LINDSAY HICKS
Cherry Hill Sun
9/3/2007

Between schoolwork, extra-curricular activities and applying to colleges, educators say high school seniors need to find time just to relax

Incoming high school senior Erica Bellman, a well-spoken student hoping to pursue a career in international relations or diplomacy, will join thousands of other local students in starting another school year next week.

Any free time the driven young woman might have found in the summer will soon be replaced with four advanced placement courses, world affairs council meetings, peer leadership, editing the school’s creative writing publication, cross-country practices and Thursday nights spent representing the student body as a Board of Education student representative. In between all of that will come the weekends – oh, and the whole college admissions thing is thrown in there somewhere, too.

She might not exactly fit the description of an Everywoman when it comes to local teens, but experts agree a student such as the Haddonfield Memorial High School student is no longer considered a minority in schools such as Cherokee High School, Cherry Hill High Schools East and West, HMHS, Eastern Regional and Moorestown High School.

Most counselors and administrators in these schools say there’s no doubt students today face way more pressure than years ago, and many attribute the spike to increased competition caused by a rise in college-bound graduates.

They also explain that in high-achieving schools, expectations reached beyond the idea of actually going to a college to going to the best, most celebrated colleges. Many start packing their schedules with club meetings, sports, SAT classes, AP courses and community service projects as early as freshmen year – with admission to the top colleges in mind.

JoAnn Jankowski, Cherokee High School’s guidance supervisor, attributes some of the increase in pressure to the influence new technology has on creating a fast-paced society – one in which information can be obtained at any time, and MySpace and instant messaging create added peer pressure for teens.

Patty Breunich, Eastern Regional High School’s guidance department supervisor, attributes the increase in stress levels among high school students to the heightened competition and the necessity for students to set themselves apart from each other.

It’s difficult to name a main source of the pressure, she said, because every student is different and there are many contributing factors.

Pressure comes from many directions: parents, school, media, community, self and peers, according to Jim Riordan, the Cherry Hill Public School District’s guidance director.

The principle of balance can be lost as students pack their schedules.

Students can get in over their heads trying to compete for admission to schools that appear on the publications’ lists of the best colleges and universities, Riordan said, and face the danger of overextending themselves.

To prevent or alleviate stress, and find true balance, experts suggest students and parents use three basic strategies:

Follow your heart

HMHS Principal Mike Wilson said he sometimes wonders whether students take on clubs to impress their resumes, or because they truly love them. Some students forget the importance of discovering their passions in the race to meet expectations in academics, athletics and community service, he explained, noting that the idea of adding more advanced courses and electives is to allow them to take time to do so.

Expanding the high school’s art program, for example, offers the group of students already following their own path more means to explore the un-tested subjects.

Bellman said she chose her course schedule based on her strengths and passion for the humanities. Science isn’t her thing, so she dropped it for senior year, to allow room for AP History, AP English Composition, AP Spanish and a required calculus course.

“I think that’s the mistake some kids make: spreading themselves so thin rather than focusing on talents and passions,” she said. “The college race is out of hand and kids don’t listen to their hearts.”

Counselors across the region agree.

Students should pick their courses based on true interests and desire to learn rather than as a means to compete with classmates for an acceptance letter, according to Breunich.

College admissions officers would rather see quality and a reflection of a student’s true self and leadership skills, rather than a student with a resume packed with 30 activities and as many AP classes they can fit, she added.

In short, that AP Spanish class will be much easier to handle for students who love the language and hope to continue the pursuit of fluency in college.

Get organized and in-the-know

Riordan always begins conversations with parents and students about helping their student cope with academic, athletic and social stresses with two words: preparation and organization.

“You need to have the skills to organize your time,” he said. “We have kids participating in three sports, multiple AP courses, volunteering, work and they are spread, but they have those skills to budget their time to organize their activities.”

Dedicating specific slots of time to homework, studying, practice and other endeavors is essential to success, he said, comparing a student to an athlete who avoids injury by training.

Bellman, the high school senior, attributes her ability to successfully manage her commitments as a student, the school board’s student representative, a world affairs council member, editor and contributor to the school’s creative writing publication, peer leader and two-sport athlete to proper planning.

Times will always come when students have a bunch of things due at once, she said, but today’s students can handle it all if they schedule their time well.

Bellman scheduled her SAT II on history after studying for and taking the AP History test her junior year, and completed most of her college applications this summer knowing time might not allow her to during the year.

Parents play another key role in the organizational component: educating one’s self on the college admissions process and the many options out there, according to Moorestown counseling director Bill Yarwood.

In a school where nearly all kids go to college, the pressure to get into a particular group of schools overwhelms the importance of finding the right school for an individual, he explained.

“We try to help students develop good matches in terms of what they want for themselves and their futures, realistic for them,” Yarwood said. “That’s not to say we don’t urge them to stretch and get into the best schools that meet those needs.”

He urges parents to attend college information nights and talk with admissions counselors early in students’ high school years to obtain a more realistic picture of the process, requirements and expectations. Otherwise, parents could base reality on rumors or assumptions, and in turn add unnecessary stress on their children.

At Cherokee, students are finally opening up to the idea of attending a community college for two years, according to Jankowski, who applauds local community schools for drastic improvements in recent years. She notes Burlington County College’s dual admissions program with Drexel University as a prime example of a way of easing the pressure to get in to a selective school as a high school student.

“Certainly, there’s always going to be those added college pressures,” she said, “but we try to have our kids pick realistic goals and encourage them to choose a reach school, something in the mid-range and also a safe school.”

Seek and provide support

Every student is different, and it is a parent’s job to know their child’s strengths, weaknesses, fears and hopes so they can provide valuable guidance through the sometimes-stormy high school years, counselors say.

Joan Bohmann, a former school psychologist and current director of professional standards and continuing professional development for the National Association of School Psychologists, said adults must work with students to pick a load of courses and activities at which they will succeed, rather than take on more things they can handle and do several things mediocre.

“I think you need to help children or teens cope with anxiety by reminding them of the options and not focus so narrowly on one goal so that it makes them ill,” she said.

Parents also have an obligation to encourage their child to be realistic about the load they take, she said, recognizing the challenge in communicating with teenagers who see themselves as more independent than they actually are.

Anxiety caused by activity and schoolwork overload should be addressed by keeping communications lines open and gathering real information from expert sources, Bohmann said, while reinforcing that high school is difficult but not insurmountable.

“Students can have a dramatic look at life; they need guidance that there are other things on your horizon, and this isn’t a make it or break it thing,” she said.

Encouraging an anxious teen to verbalize his or her fears and desires is a great first step, by asking something like, “What is the worst thing that will happen if you don’t get into Yale?” because their concept can be irrational and they need an adult to help them gain perspective.

Riordan says parents add to the stress of the college search process by focusing on one negative piece.

Parents, teachers and other confidants should consider approaching the search process by highlighting strengths such as recommendations, activities or writing skills, rather than discouraging a college due to an SAT score.